Recently, it has become apparent to me that I am expected, on some level, to have children. My parents have referenced their future grandchildren, and various women in my life keep saying things like, "just wait til you have children." Not if, when.
When I was little, I always thought I'd be a mom and have all these children to look after, so I never imagined having a career. In my mind, future Jay was a stay-at-home mom, and very happy. And then I started babysitting for various families, and it was not my cup of tea. Children are terrors til they get to be eight or nine, I have discovered. I love spending time with my younger cousins, but being solely responsible for a child for eighteen years is a terrifying and less than ideal situation for myself, I have decided.
But the thing is, people will keep making the assumption. I just refuted one woman's comment over dinner, and things got very quiet afterwards. It's not an entirely welcome concept to most people, I feel. What does a woman do without children? Well, I'm going to keep taking my birth control pills (or pregnancy repellent, as I call them) and do whatever the hell I want to do with my life. If future Jay wants a baby, she can go for it. But present Jay is saying no to motherhood and being vocal about it. Because feminism. So there.
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